Hey mama, I see you.
You're spinning plates, while juggling glass balls, and oh! -- everything is on fire. 🔥
It feels like everyone else is managing this better than you.
Everything seems hard.
It IS hard. And you're tired of struggling and feeling stuck in survival mode.
None of us knew what we were doing when we became parents, no matter what previous experience we had. Neither did our parents, or their parents, either.
It's not just about learning how to keep your kids alive, healthy, and fed. Parenting is a huge personal development journey that adds to the steep learning curve of becoming a parent, especially a mom.
- Many of us never learned how to hold space for big feelings, for ourselves or for others.
- Many of us were expected to conform to rigid social standards that weren't healthy for us.
- Many of us were taught or shown that everyone else's needs came before our own.
Then we think, "If I just mommed harder, planned better, exercised more, were more grateful, then it would be easier and I'd be happy like everyone else."
If only it worked that way.
"A collaborative environment with like minded individuals going through similar issues is completely priceless."
-- Kim Barry"I have prioritized my self-care more than I used to. I have felt empowered to do this and set more clear boundaries regarding parenting and household duties. I have felt incredible support through shared experiences in motherhood which has helped me find the confidence to make these changes in my life."
-- Allison G.
Wouldn't it be great if parenting came with a handbook?
It could cover how to feel like yourself while raising kids in alignment with your values, even if you weren't raised in a way you care to repeat, while successfully adulting and overthrowing oppressive systems while showering regularly. Simple stuff.
Or, even better, what if there were MOM SCHOOL?
This isn't about how to parent your child, because you already know enough to do that. You know that parenting is about meeting your child where they are with empathy, and being the calm in the storm.
You KNOW that, but that means you also have to work on yourself to put it into practice. That's the hard part that the parenting books sort of gloss over.
(And I'm not talking about that generic stuff. Deep breathing is great, but can only get you so far.)
That's where Mom School comes in. It's not about your kids. It's about YOU.
- It's about aligning who you are as a person and who you are as a parent.
- It's about identifying your values and obstacles to living out those ideals.
- It's about naming the systems that prevent our success so we can give up the guilt.
Sure, you can post in a Facebook group, but then you have to put your business out there in front of a bunch of people who have their own agendas.
Does that sound a little scary?
We're fed this idea that The Perfect Mom not only exists, but that we must become her by entirely pushing away our own wants, needs, and goals. As if raising perfectly behaved children is our entire purpose for being.
That is simply not true. You deserve support for yourself. Not because you're a mom. Because you're you, and you are inherently worthy.
Any investment you make in yourself will benefit your family, but only because it will benefit YOU.
"Before, I felt overwhelmed and out of ideas on how to change for the better. Kinda stuck. The call and exercises really gave me:
1. Time to focus on myself (a little bit of self care that someone else schedules for me.)
2. Peace of mind that everyone struggles (I'm not crazy) and
3. It gave me a new way to face the daily struggles. A different perspective. More tools for my tool box. However you want to word it, it helped me."
-- Chelsea"Thank you, Stacy, for always holding space, even for the really hard and uncomfortable stuff. I paid another coach $2000 for what you just told me in 2 minutes."
-- Julia
Who is Mom School for?
You're a stressed-out, overwhelmed mom or nonbinary/gender non-conforming primary parent. You have negative 17 brain cells to spare and already don't sleep. And you want things to be different but can't quite figure out where to start (see list above for valid reasons why).
I get it, I am right there with you. (P.S. If you see my toddler, please let her know that 4am is for SLEEPING, thanks.)
Also it probably looks like you actually have your act together because you have everything balanced so precariously that it's kind of working--so long as nothing goes wrong.
Spoiler: Something always goes wrong.
But underneath that careful façade, jokes about being a "hot mess mom," and a few layers of under-eye concealer, you're worried that people will figure out how fragile you feel.
- You don't have to join another group on Facebook or anywhere else.
- There are no long videos to watch.
- All you need to do is check your email at least once per week.
Why me?
If you don't already know me, hi! 👋🏻 I'm Stacy (she/her).
I've been working as a coach for a decade, but shifted my focus to working with parents after the birth of my oldest child in 2013. I now have 3 kids (aged 2, 4, and 8), and I experienced a seismic shift in my life after becoming a mother.
When I was struggling to figure myself, my kid, and my identity out, I had a hard time finding resources that were in line with my values or actually practical. I made it my mission to prevent other parents from feeling that way if I could. You are not alone.
In addition to working with individual clients since 2011, I've been teaching classes and leading parenting groups in San Diego and online since 2015. I also admin an 8,000 member lactation support group on Facebook.
Articles are my love language, and I joke that I read all the books and the internet for you to curate what actually helps. After helping hundreds of parents and families feel more confident in their decisions, boundaries, and values, I wanted to create this space just for you.
Lucky for me, I went to coaching school before I started having kids.
Lucky for you, you can save the time and money involved in that process, plus all the self-help books I've read and coaches I've paid by letting me summarize it for you! 😘
I've been featured in the San Diego Union-Tribune, the BlinkaBear blog, BabyGaga, Your Mom Friend Podcast, the International Parenting Summit, and the MommyBlossom Podcast. I also host my own podcast and have my first book being published in May!
I'm an enneagram type 1, extrovert, night owl, and people earnestly list being "bossy" as one of my best traits. My kids (and I) are neurodivergent, and our family is unabashedly nerdy (I'm learning to play Dungeons & Dragons along with my kids -- my character is a half-elf cleric). If I could go to school forever, I would, and frequently take classes just because I love to learn. I've recently fallen back in love with reading, especially sci-fi/fantasy, and I'm secretly obsessed with art journals even though I've never made one.
So what do you get in Mom School?
This program takes the most common issues I cover with my individual coaching clients and in my support groups, and puts it all together into 6 weeks of digestible content for you. This isn't generic advice, but small prompts that build on each other so you can create personalized tools and goals for yourself.
Could you do this on your own? Sure. But how many things for yourself have you postponed since having kids? Getting support isn't a sign of weakness. We're social creatures who thrive in community.
The "assignments" are so quick that you can watch the daily video and still fit in an episode of Bridgerton after the kids are in bed (or Outlander, whichever you're on).
It takes you out of crisis mode and actually walks you through ways to change your perspective and make space for yourself in your own life.
There are 4 weeks of topics with small steps to work on, then 2 weeks for implementation because life happens. I (virtually) hold your hand through the whole process.
What topics will we cover?
- Parenting Values: We'll set an intention for the course, identify our top values and beliefs, and create "MOMifestos" to remind us of what's really important on this journey.
- Stop Should-ing All Over Yourself: It's easy to get caught up in all the things we "should" do, but are those really what will benefit our kids or us? We'll start with areas you're feeling stuck and reframe that guilt to prioritize what you REALLY need.
- Self-Care: So often self-care turns into one more stressful item on the never-ending to-do list. This approach will help you find ways to squeeze in small amounts of self-care to prevent burnout, and create realistic systems to make self-care easier to fit in when you can.
- Motherhood and Identity: Having kids can shift our priorities in surprising ways, and it can be tough to discover who you are again. Feeling like "more than a mom" can have a huge impact on your mental health and increase your wellbeing.
I don't just want to throw information at you. You already HAVE too much information. You've read the books and the blog posts and the Facebook threads. Information is NOT the problem. The focus here is on walking you through the steps.
What you get:
- A workbook with all the content in one place to print out and fill in.
- Emails each weekday with a small, doable assignment, explained in a short video.
- Two weeks of topics followed by an implementation week to allow for life to happen.
- Live Zoom calls to kick us off, wrap up, and for office hours in between for virtual "face-to-face" support.
In 6 weeks we will:
- write our personal "MOMifestos" to align your values with your actions
- kick mom guilt to the curb so you feel more confident making decisions
- talk about the issues with self-care and what realistic implementation looks like
- and discuss identities before after kids and how to feel like "more than a mom" again
"Before Stacy's program I was feeling lost and unsure how to handle this new stage. My expectations needed to be adjusted. I gained many new tools and a whole new perspective. I was really just looking for others to relate with, but I got so much more. Stacy provided me with new tools and and a better understanding of myself. I wasn't sure if I would get much out of it, but I was totally wrong. I got way more than I expected and the support of others was priceless. Sometimes you just need to relate and know you're not alone."
-- Shawna"This course was awesome. It feels great to do something for yourself. The 'homework' isn't intimidating, the videos are fun, and you'll come away with actions for things you didn't even know you needed. It's hard for some moms to spend money and time to work on themselves because we are conditioned to just give and give and give. And that's exactly the kind of mom that needs this course."
-- Julie Sanders
You deserve to have the support you need.
I can't wait for our first day!
XOXO
Stacy
